whiteboywaves:

me: I need to pee

me: Or does my pee need to me

starksexual:

i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it

skate-high:

To me, songs are kind of like bookmarks. Have you ever listened to a song that you haven’t heard in a while, and all of a sudden, all the memories of that time period come back, and you remember what your life used to be like. They’re like milestones in your life.

bulletbakas:

Ain’t no friendship like a friendship where you’re either confused as siblings or gay lovers

njena:

i think the reason perfume commercials are so weird is because they have to advertise a smell without using smells